In a recent conversation with a friend of mine, we decided that emotions could be described as near instantaneous subconscious means of processing multiple environmental inputs. (He has a masters in therapy, and if you’ve read my blog at all, you know that’s just how I think about things.) The thing I found interesting about this view of emotions is that it completely disagrees with the nebulous presentation of emotions by my second therapist. He encouraged me to not view emotions in terms of the utility derived from them, but rather I should simply feel and experience them without regards to their usefulness.
While there is merit to the idea of being able to experience each emotion, it is wholly incomplete. The idea of not limiting myself to feeling useful emotions, but immersing myself in all of them seemed superfluous. Then again, I’m the one that often speaks of necessary superfluity.
In a former life, or at least an earlier part of my current life, I was what the Germans refer to as a literary scientist. We would dissect literature, and find all sorts of things inside that made the stories take on deeper and deeper meaning that the majority of humans look at and simply think that we’re crazy. Continue reading
People have been asking about meaning as long as we have had any records. We wonder if the apple (never actually mentioned in scripture as an apple) in the garden of Eden was sexual sin (no real doctrinal basis for this one in the bible), if it was the acquisition of godly knowledge (more likely, though not entirely doctrinally sound, since it was called the tree of knowledge of good and evil), whether it was an actual tree or if it was simply an allegorical symbol. Continue reading
Kant speaks of das Unvermögen sich seines Verstandes ohne des Leiten eines anderen zu bedienen. What if the other he references is not always another person? We often think of those who serve as Vormünder as being those authority figures who demand blind obedience, sacrificing the rational thought that is the hallmark of Kantian enlightenment. Kant speaks of Priests who serve as our conscience, Doctors who prescribe out diets, Professors who tell us how to write and what we should think about certain things. (OK, I added that last one, but it does fit.) Continue reading
I’ve been thinking about this term for a long time. I’ve been called a hypocrite by a number of people. Interestingly, it has almost always been by those are mad at me for trying to bring my life in line with my values, not by those who are mad that I’ve strayed from them. As the linguist that I am, I decided I should really look into the term, and what it means to decide if I am indeed a hypocrite.
The definition that I’ve found that I’ll use as the basis of our discussion is “a false show of having a virtuous character, that one does not really have.” Continue reading
For years, I have heard people tell me that I was fighting a losing battle. I was told that I was gay, and that there was nothing I could do but accept that fact. I was told that homosexuality was an immutable characteristic, and that to even attempt to change my sexuality would do nothing but cause psychological harm. I never believed any of it. Continue reading
The post on my last relapse was one that I didn’t really want to write, but it seemed necessary. (I don’t like to relapse.) I was hopeful when I wrote it though. I really felt that by doing the things in my action plan, that I would be able to stave off further relapses. So far it has had not only that effect, but has helped me to feel better about myself in general. (This is no small feat, given my unemployment, and accompanying glut of free time.)
There have been a couple of things that have been particularly helpful. One of them is the Relapse Prevention Sheet. Continue reading